Deductive Reasoning

If you live in G-E-O-R-G-I-A

and,

it's the dead of S-U-M-M-E-R

and,

it's 92 degrees with 90% humidity

and,

you don't have enough money to buy a condensing unit, a line set and a few feet of duct...

and,

you truly believe you're entitled to a handout

but,

you truly think a good summer job is selling crack on the side of the road


then,

logic would have it that...


you're way too fucking stupid and lazy to have a pet.


The pigs across the street have a dog I know they are breeding to fight. The pigs next door have a puppy that they can barely feed. Neither of these animals have been spayed or neutered. How do I know that? Because they don't even know how to neuter their own family members. If a 22-year old has a four-year old kid, who needs a spay job?

One of the problems with irresponsible pet owners is that they don't fix their animals. Then the animals get out, let nature take over, then we have more animals. Since the dipshits that started this mess can't even feed their own kids, they let these animals loose and they become stray.

These stray dogs killed my cat. "Linus, the Cat, the Squirrely, Squirrely Cat" (if you know the story of the squirrels, you'll get the reference).

"Linus-of-the-jungle".

I miss my cat.

The best thing about Linus was that he HUNTED because it was his nature. I had dead squirrels, rats, mice, birds, roaches, rats... you name it - show up on my back porch when he was on patrol. This was a "thanks" for him. Had he thought anything different, he would have eaten these critters and left their bones in the woods, but he knew he had been well fed and he was only bringing me back what he could.

The first time I've ever wanted to kill an animal was when I realized these stray dogs had killed Linus. Then I re-directed that anger to where it belongs... now I'm going to kill the pigs across the street who put those dogs in that situation.

Maybe when I finish the task and they begin a run to the Pearly Gates, they will find that God is actually a four-legged furry critter and He will exact His revenge appropriately.

Rest in Peace, Linus-the-CAT. I hope you got to Heaven and realize it is actually one big CATNIP farm. I'll always miss you, Tiger.