I had to do something today that I've never had to do before. I had to put my Little Man to sleep so he wouldn't suffer anymore. He was only four years old (he would have been five on Valentine's Day) and the doctors said it was extremely rare for a cat that young to have such severe kidney disease and the end came on very quickly. He actually climbed into my lap Thursday night and tucked his head under my arm. I think that's when he told me it was time for him to go, but I still didn't want to admit it. Friday morning, he came to me again, this time he looked right at me and cried. He was in real pain and I knew it was time.
I didn't want him to die in the hospital. I didn't want him to die with strangers around him. I wanted him to die at home, but when I went to visit him yesterday, he didn't look like my Little Man, he looked like he was in a drug-relieved state of non-existence. It took about ten minutes of scratches under the chin for him to even seem to know who I was, but the doctor said if I brought him home, he would die slowly of dehydration, which is no way to go, either.
Emmett showed up on the doorstep four years ago. Just like God dropped him off and said, "Have at it - your first boy". And what a handful he's been. He always beat up on Ms. Sterling, always tried to be the first to escape to the outside and he even stole BYT from the Baby. How cruel to give him to me for only four years, then take him away so quickly (and no, Father Fitz, I don't want to read the Book of Job - again!)
Anna is the saddest because he was definately her best friend, but all the cats know he won't be coming home again.
I know God will take the best care of him, I'm just being selfish because I love my Little Man so much and the emptiness is breathtaking.
Goodbye, Poppy. I'll see you again one day.
I'm so sorry and I will always love you so very much.
1 comment:
Sorry to hear of your loss. I am glad I don't have any children or pets for this very reason.
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